History 101

A long time ago in a world that has changed a lot , a lot of very brave Englishmen discovered most of the world, what they didn’t discover the Italians and Spanish did, some French and Dutch did find some places to .

Ok so to Tasmania , well once upon a time the world was one , we (Tasmania) belonged to Chile and Australia was Italian, yes it was  I have looked on the maps of old and we fit .  I will fill dates in as I go here but a man called Tasman  who was very able came here in a boat , much like my mumbly cumbus but it was not powered by a mariner engine and was a little bigger. Ok he came here and said oh lordy that’s a place that has a lot of strange things and he wasn’t talking about the native or the land, he apparently saw a tiger and a devil and a few odd marsupials which are like a duck but live in weird places. He discovered Sidmouth by mistake as he was heading off to Hobart and got lost along the way , any ways we will talk more of him later. Now we English owned most of the world , you can all say you stole it from India Canada America blah blah but we didn’t it was ours and we paid for it in beans much like the Indians get beads . ok so the history of austral is from a humble cook, he came here and had a barby and the ate a natives pet and they didn’t like that much so he had to leave fast on his boat that he had an endeavour to board. Ok he came with some Italians and left them here to make stuff.


Not an itailan at speed it Fran and I was playing with my timer machine lol

Frans off for one more day now and we are just trying to find some cloths that she still fits lol, the boys are not happy , ok where was I on my history lesson. History was never a strong point with me and was along with many of my school lessons a good time to put my head on the desk and sleep, I never got in trouble for this for some reason, maybe I was just to good at the subjects as is now proven in my potted history of Tasmania. Ok back to the boring history lesson. Tasmania is a land founded on trees and apples, we love to cut trees down and make all sorts of things with them , a lot of people in Launceston don’t like that we burn them as it makes smoke and smog and as it’s a basin they don’t like it much, I don’t like that we have brown outs as the power gets shifted from us to them but they don’t know about that . ok stop the whinging and political stuff Fran said no lol. Gold was found in Tasmania and we have it here in Beaconsfield but it costs to much for us to get to it so we now have a closed mine and lots of holes under the ground. When Tasmania was joined to the rest of the world we where pretty insignificant , not a great deal has changed in that respect. We have had some very famous people come from here Errol Flynn and some other dudes that play sport , they (Tasmanians  remember im English) love sport. I don’t understand a lot of sports as they involve weird rules and if you are to kick a football then so be it but off side and all that ehhh ok yes I do understand that one its all to do with where the player was when the ball was booted , but aussie football is weird it rugby crossed with jumping and fighting , much like WWE I guess but with a ball and a lot more men in the arenas at one time usually. Ok  history again….. We make a lot of wine and that’s part of what I love , we make wine , but we have a snobbery with wine and its getting like that with beer and food, alcohol is to make you drunk , merry and stuff like that , food is to make you not hungry and make you go emmm nice , its not how the grapes and hops and things where hand stroked by virgins and how the cow was rubbed with baby oil by the farmers wife every day for 6 weeks and then massaged with essential oils till it was humanly KILLED . ok back to the wine ( I don’t have any)  if I drink wine I sleep a lot more for some reason. Now in Launceston we have a lot or really nice old places , they have a lot of history about them and there are even some ghosts  around, I have seen a ghost before it was a old woman in a field in the pissing rain  on a country road in Essex , ok folks go look up Essex and ghosts and you will see we had heaps there. Headless carriage men army men and all sorts . A famous thing in Tasmania north is the beer, we make a good drop here called Boags and that’s been here for ages to , they make some in a place called Hobart but we in the north don’t know much of this Hobart apart from its got a mountain and a green part office there and  a lot of tourists go that way before the come to see us on the river.


Cold has come and it was nippy this night

We live in a place called Sidmouth , I think that maybe a Englishman called Sid lived on the mouth of a river and when the earth split apart he was over on this part of the earth and came over in the great float of old, he missed his mouth of the river in the part that is now called the uk  and he named a lot of places here with the names he knew, like Exeter,Tamar, Sidmouth ,Launceston,,, get the idea, like Americans calling places after English places , same story all over , remember I told you we  owned everything at one time and just gave it all away like bill gates is doing with his riches.


Pretty and pretty cold lol

When I first came to Tasmania I saw a lot of English things , I think that maybe birds  brought them over in there beaks as we have Hawthorns here and Sloe berries and lots of other uk trees, we have sparrows and starlings and other English birds so this backs up my theory. We have a lot of nature here and apparently we don’t have many foxes which is a shame as if we had more we would have less possums Earl hates them (possums). When we became a island we had a lot of migrants left on here from the great splitting of old and we had a lot of Italians left here , we have a vast Italian community in Australia and I think that they like Tasmania to , we have some Dutch and Germans and lots of other races in our little community but I have only met German and Dutch and English and the odd native so far. Ok history facts now.. did you know that…


Good pics but I got a little chilly taking them lol (theres a theme here)

1816: First emigrant ship arrives with free settlers from England

We send our skilled people over here after the split from the world and they like it here and keep coming.

1834: Launceston “female factory” completed

There where not enough women so much like god we had to make  them we made lots as there are 4 to every man  im not sure what the Tasmanians used maybe apples and stuff like that ?

1842: The Weekly Examiner begins publication in Launceston

It’s a news paper that has articles about politics and sports and is bias nuff said.

1869: Submarine communications cable successfully establishes link between Tasmania and Melbourne.

Theres a sign for this at paper beach, haven’t seen the submarine yet.

1877: Gold discovered at Beaconsfield

See I was right

1888: Launceston proclaimed a city

Big deal its really not that big ok

1909: Irish blight wipes out potato crop

A black day for fries and crisps indeed


Getting warmer now folks 🙂

Ok so I think that history is a long subject that I am not that interested in , I could go on here and make stuff up about the region being like France in the terwah and how we have the best area to grow grapes and how it is very like France as we have MAMIL everwhere ( I have been itching to use this an _acronym) Middle Aged Men In Lyra lol yes cyclists, I don’t understand this here I am older now and have a lot more about me than when I was young but I am blessed with a fast metabolism and cant really say im fat , ok now I wouldn’t dream of wearing lycra but I see them all the time beer guts wiggling in the breeze and there  2 wheeled perambulators propped up at the café and there they are looking like a pod of over ripe peas ready to explode out of there  rubber clothes , ech why it doesn’t make them attractive to anything else apart from other MAMILs ok so that’s my thoughts on them , they do annoy me and get in my way when I head into town. If any of Frans readers are of the mamil persuasion then forgive me , I just don’t get it , ride a bike in jeans and a t shirt and enjoy it and  just remember there are middle aged men like me looking at you and saying oh man do you have any idea what you look like..


Nearly fire like eh

So I have come to the end of my Fridays posting and will do some more tomorrow but now I have a mission to animate something for Frans blog , wish me luck


A bit cooler now

Saturday is here I have waled the dogs feed the birds and animated a flashing neon sign in my flash assignment (way ahead here ) and have made an animated stick man and if I was assed I would finish the rest of my animation but I am ahead enough for the day , I have some wood to chop and some fires to make , the cockys are out screaming and I also have to try and get you guys some pics to put in this post emmm ok I think that’s what I will do in a bit , you may yet get pics of chainsaws and stuff lol , ok thanks for listening to my blog hope you enjoyed it and come back some yallllll.


Winters here in Tassie


Bezials not to happy with Earl laying on him and Fran taking pics

Talking of Fran heres a vid for you all to watch and Christi you have to show the B>O the hootchi cootch lol


Enjoy your week and Frans home a day later so I will maybe start a guest post she can finish .

Ps All the pics seen here have not been photoshopped beyond belief they actually looked this way 🙂

30 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. brymnsons
    Jun 08, 2013 @ 17:25:11

    Some lovely shots Steve, very picturesque. I’m a little concerned with what “waling the dogs” might be 🙂 but I hope it is walking… Love your history of Tassie. I think historians everywhere will be rolling in their graves lol. Really enjoyed reading your blog and the animation was quite cute too.


  2. LyndaD
    Jun 08, 2013 @ 17:42:02

    I cant not imagine how interesting it must be to sit at a table with you two and just let it roll. You are both so intel yet funny as. I loved your take on Tasmanian history and all its quirky twists and turns. I especially wanted to tell you. Steve, how much i enjoy your photography. I dream of waking up one day to your morning view, so watch out, you just might find a strange middle aged woman parked with her camper in your driveway demanding breakfast! If i was rich (in money cause im a very wealthy person in every other way) id buy that property next door. Keep Writing.


    • quarteracrelifestyle
      Jun 08, 2013 @ 19:20:46

      I was actually thinking exactly that – their conversations must be a giggle to listen to lol


      • narf77
        Jun 13, 2013 @ 02:36:29

        Most of our conversations are punctuated with expletives because we don’t do study well together Wendy ;).

      • quarteracrelifestyle
        Jun 13, 2013 @ 06:10:46

        lol….I’ll tell you a secret, Roger and I cannot work in the garden together, he has his way and I have mine and it’s incorrect lol

      • narf77
        Jun 13, 2013 @ 07:25:08

        I agree…Steve and I spend most of our time bickering around and as we are both exact opposites, if we ever got together and worked on something at the same time we would be dangerous! 😉

      • Linne
        Jun 14, 2013 @ 04:31:33

        I’m not going in the garden with both of you (Narfie n Steve or Christi n Roger) LOL. I’d be spending all my time trying to create peace, harmony and understanding. I’d likely get stuck on the understanding part first and just go off by myself and work. 🙂

        You are all a hoot, in my not so humble opinion. LOL

      • narf77
        Jun 14, 2013 @ 14:26:01

        Christi and Roger eh? I don’t think that the B.O. is called Roger Linnie, I think that might be Wendy’s hubby in N.Z. I think you are amassing new friends faster than their husbands can keep up 😉

  3. Chica Andaluza
    Jun 08, 2013 @ 18:16:40

    Brilliant, brilliant and funny too! Luckily no MAMILs here up our mountain 🙂 Loved the shots. I think I may be part Tasmanian what with having a British and Italian passport and a Spanish other half….well, here’s hoping!


    • narf77
      Jun 13, 2013 @ 02:35:50

      Steve appears to have been slacking in replying to my dear constant readers so I am just glad that I managed to come back to a few of you still intact ;). You can have all of our MAMIL’s if you like. I will even live on the cheap for a month so that I can afford the postage to Spain (no air holes though so you sign for them sight unseen O.K.? 😉 )


  4. quarteracrelifestyle
    Jun 08, 2013 @ 19:21:51

    A good post Steve, Fran shouldn’t have too much to complain about there 🙂


  5. christiok
    Jun 09, 2013 @ 01:18:00

    Steve, you are a genius, no doubt about it! You have your own English, and it is charming beyond reason. “Hand-stroked by virgins”, “woman factory in Launceton”, and “MAMIL” all made me laugh out loud. And did you know that Kingston is just a half hour north of here? It’s not in England anymore. Your hoochie coochie animation is inspired…and the B.O. smiled when he saw it — “Clearly,” he says, “that is a woman who has been startled by a possum.” Much love to you and Fran. You have done her proud.


  6. teawithhazel
    Jun 09, 2013 @ 09:00:04

    loved your post steve..i especially loved your theory about the birds and hawthorn and sloe trees!


  7. cathyandchucky
    Jun 09, 2013 @ 10:57:26

    Hahahahaha! Loving the Hoochie Coochie woman Steve. Your photos are amazing but you live that dream every day. Beautiful place. I always feel such melancholy when I see those photos though knowing Dads not there anymore. Albeit, he’s just having a lie down in the cemetary next door 😀


    • narf77
      Jun 13, 2013 @ 02:40:14

      You would be amazed at where dad “is” these days Pinky…whenever I am out hanging washing on the line and a crow flies past and croaks at me he is there…whenever we are slaving away digging holes, concreting in poles, chopping wood, hauling horse poo there he is telling me I am doing it wrong, that I am dumping it in the wrong place or that we did our dough…he might be having a kip in the cemetery but he certainly makes his presence felt a lot 😉


      • cathyandchucky
        Jun 13, 2013 @ 08:51:32

        Hahaha they are his spiritual henchmen Fronkii. Dad would be so proud of you both. He may not have said it but he knew you and Steve would look after his and Vals place the best. I told him neither Jamie nor I would be able to do what needed to be done on the property and you were the best ones for the job. 😀 Try thinking of the crows as saying good on you instead. 😀

  8. Anthropogen
    Jun 11, 2013 @ 03:36:36

    I’ve been reading about the intrepid Tasman in my book, Ecological Imperialism: the biological expansion of Europe 900 – 1900 (by Alfred Crosby).


  9. Littlesundog
    Jun 11, 2013 @ 07:23:44

    Stunning photos, Steve… and I love your writing style to boot! Also, I was glad you gave me my “Earl” fix… he’s my fav, ya know!


    • narf77
      Jun 13, 2013 @ 02:41:05

      Earl was sleeping and handed over the dog pic duty to Qi (or Piggins as we call her 😉 ) so hopefully you won’t be too disappointed today 🙂


  10. athursdayschild has a long way to go and much to be thankful for.
    Jun 11, 2013 @ 23:09:45

    You are educating me about Tazmania. Who would have thought I would start reading a blog set in Tazmania….a small world in some respects. If only we could teleport.


    • narf77
      Jun 12, 2013 @ 03:00:44

      Not so sure about “Tazmania” I think I might just have to read Steve’s blog post now to see what he got up to while I was away at my daughters! I had to stay an extra day because “someone” inconveniently made Monday a public holiday and I couldn’t get half of the shopping so had to stay till Tuesday. Now I have to get today’s post done whilst cowering at the apex of a massive amount of RSS Feed read blogs to tackle, never let it be said that I don’t like a challenge ;). See you tonight 🙂


  11. Linne
    Jun 14, 2013 @ 04:41:44

    Steve, great post! you made me laugh so many times . . . and I love watching Fran do the Hootchie Cootchie; she’s so fast and you must have had to draw even faster to get all the details down so well . . . she’ll have to dance for me when I get down there . . . Loved the history lesson, too. Hate to disillusion you, the Brits don’t even own their island . . . unless you are Pictish or the like . . . not sure where they all came from . . . did they have ‘women factories’ where you are from? What about ‘men factories’? Those would be more useful, I think . . .

    Your photos are incredible; I think you will end up with more than one RV in your driveway and likely a bunch of backpacking old hippies happily encamped all over the place. Not to worry . . . think of us as semi-free labour . . . 🙂

    Thanks for filling in while Narfie7 was lollygagging around in town (and I don’t buy that ‘Monday was a holiday’ bit, either. Besides, if she’d learn to make things herself, she wouldn’t have to go to town to buy them, then you wouldn’t be penniless student hippies, would you? (better not let her read this reply; she might unfriend me . . . lol)


  12. Allotment adventures with Jean
    Jul 02, 2013 @ 05:08:20

    Steve I don’t know how I missed this fabulous post of yours. I must have been out chasing men that day. So pleased I came back to it as your writing is brilliant. So funny, and rather dangerous for this old lady to read because too much hysterical laughter can make one wet oneself. I did history at school but your lesson was much more informative. I am so pleased that Mr Tasman was so Able.
    Love the beautiful photographs. The Hoochie Coochie woman is very clever. Does Fran really carry on like that?


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